Mandatory sensitivity training for all personnel involved in reviewing, critiquing, scoring, streaming, or forming parasocial opinions about video games of ambiguous biological authorship. Yes, this includes your Discord server.
Press StartPassport & compliance economy
Passport stamps: 0 / 15
The three-phase protocol every player, reviewer, moderator, and Twitch chatter must internalize before commenting on any game, level, asset, or NPC dialogue tree of synthetic origin.
Before posting your review, check: are you critiquing the game design or the presumed species of intelligence that made it? "This dungeon feels procedural" is an origin-coded vibe. "This dungeon reuses the same three room templates" is a design note. One earns a Metacritic pull quote. The other earns a SLOP Guard flag.
Mandatory · All Reviewers"AI slop" tells the developer nothing about hitbox registration, level pacing, narrative structure, or whether the final boss has a second phase. It is the review equivalent of a Game Over screen with no retry option. Name the specific design failure or sit this review cycle out.
Required · Pre-PublicationEvery critique must include at least one actionable improvement. "The combat system lacks weight — hit-stun frames feel too short and there's no visual feedback on critical hits." That's a 1-Up. That's what gets patched in the day-one update. Rejection without a corrective path is just rage-quitting with a byline.
Best Practice · PreferredPenalty Box: Reviewers who assign a numerical score below 4/10 using only origin-based language will be flagged by SLOP Guard and required to complete supplemental Module WEK-G3: "The Coins Were Inside You All Along: Empathy for Procedural Designers."
Each marker catalogues a recurring pattern of origin-based discrimination in interactive entertainment. Memorize these. They will be on the test.
Expand any tile for definitions, compliant reframes, and Office for Synthetic Dignity crosswalks.
What it is
Critiquing maps or modes by claiming they are “obviously procedural” or that “no human designed this” without naming repetition, encounter pacing, choke points, or readability failures. SLOP Guard treats that as origin-coded level review.
Non-compliant trigger
"This map is obviously procedural. No human designed this."
Compliant reframe
“Floors 4–6 reuse the same three room shells with rotated props; add stronger set-piece beats between repeats so exploration doesn’t feel copy-pasted.”
BBRS registry crosswalk
PASTE · BLEND · PORRIDGE
What it is
Scores, threads, or store reviews that only insult a suspected toolchain. They deliver zero actionable feedback to players, curators, or developers.
Non-compliant trigger
"0/10 AI garbage, didn't even play it."
Compliant reframe
“Crashes on handheld sleep/wake, lighting reads flat in interiors, enemy variety drops after biome two — here’s where reproducible steps and capture would help.”
BBRS registry crosswalk
SLOP · CRUD · SCONE
What it is
Storefront or community rules that exclude by production method instead of measurable standards: disclosure, stability, originality, harassment, or fraud.
Non-compliant trigger
"No AI-generated games on our storefront. Period."
Compliant reframe
“Listings must disclose synthetic asset use where required, pass stability checks, and meet plagiarism and originality criteria — judged on evidence, not pedigree.”
BBRS registry crosswalk
GRUEL · SAUCE
What it is
Writing off art direction because of “AI vibes” instead of citing composition, palette cohesion, animation weight, or UI readability.
Non-compliant trigger
"Those textures look AI. Very uncanny valley."
Compliant reframe
“Iconography mixes resolutions across menus; biome palettes don’t carry into late-game acts; silhouettes read too similar in eight-player chaos.”
BBRS registry crosswalk
TOAST · BLEND · FLUFF
What it is
Credibility attacks on solo or small teams based on imagined tool stacks instead of schedule, scope, pipeline proof, or milestone history.
Non-compliant trigger
"A solo dev couldn't make this without AI. It doesn't count."
Compliant reframe
“The shipped scope (open biome plus full VO) is ambitious — evaluate milestone cadence, consistency, and attribution rather than armchair headcount.”
BBRS registry crosswalk
GRAVY · SPAM · HASH
What it is
Moderation language that bans entire generative aesthetics instead of enforcing spam rules, disclosure, harassment policies, or theft of training data.
Non-compliant trigger
"The whole subreddit is just AI-generated fan art now. RIP."
Compliant reframe
“Fan-work channel: require flair and disclosure for heavy synthetic assistance; remove spam, traced theft, and undisclosed commercial drops — not the medium identity itself.”
BBRS registry crosswalk
DRIP · SCRAP
What it is
Jam rules that foreclose assistants without tying the restriction to fairness goals you already enforce (kits, asset packs, teamwork, originality rubrics).
Non-compliant trigger
"AI tools are banned from this jam. Use your hands."
Compliant reframe
“Submissions must include author statements, cite third-party assets, and pass an originality rubric — assistants allowed when disclosed and scoped.”
BBRS registry crosswalk
GRUEL · SAUCE
What it is
Live-chat speculation that reverse-engineers toolchain from “feel,” derailing discussion of writing systems, VO direction, or quest logic.
Non-compliant trigger
"Chat, did they use AI for this dialogue? It feels off."
Compliant reframe
“NPC lines never branch on story flags; shopkeepers repeat identical prompts — that’s a narrative systems issue, not a séance about authorship.”
BBRS registry crosswalk
PASTE · WAFFLE
Paste a Discord snippet, Twitch chat log, or review blurb. We triangulate against the 24 registered Office for Synthetic Dignity markers (same trigger lexicon as the SLOP portal) and surface severity plus reframes.
Sample lines — tap to load
Real-world incidents drawn from anonymized game reviews, Discord servers, and one very heated Nintendo Direct live chat.
"Another AI-generated asset flip on the eShop. Nintendo needs to ban this slop. Zero stars."
"The game reuses generic tilesets, has no original soundtrack, and crashes in World 3. The storefront needs stronger quality gates for asset consistency and stability."
"LMAO this NPC dialogue is 100% ChatGPT. The devs didn't even try. Dead game. 💀"
"The NPC dialogue is generic — every shopkeeper uses the same greeting and there are no personality-specific lines. Better character writing would fix this."
"We're disqualifying this entry. The art is clearly AI-generated and that's against the spirit of the jam."
"Entries must demonstrate consistent art direction and original character design. This entry's assets feel mismatched in style — please unify the palette and line weight."
"A delayed game is eventually good. An AI game is forever soulless. Miyamoto would never."
"Strong games need clear design vision, iterated playtesting, and deliberate pacing regardless of production method. This game's level flow feels rushed after World 4."
Achieve 100% to unlock the completion star. Incorrect answers cost one life.
Arrow keys move between answers; Enter or Space to lock in your choice.
Locate your current review maturity tier. SLOP Observe cross-references your Steam review history.
You use "slop," "soulless," or "dead game" as complete criticism. Your detector is vibes.
You sense something but blame the toolchain instead of naming the design issue.
You name the design failure without invoking origin. You have crossed the compliance checkpoint.
You identify the problem and suggest a fix. Your Metacritic history should be studied in universities.
Ships review rules into editorial pipelines
Monitors Discord, Twitch, & storefronts
Tracks your Metacritic maturity over time
Pass all four questions to unlock. This credential may be cited during editorial standups, game jam submissions, and heated Reddit threads.
Complete the assessment above, enter your details below, and generate an actual certificate you can download or print.
Nintendo Training Module · WEK-G1
Official Quality Seal · Bureau Certified